To my little boy,

When I hear your feet pitter patter down the stairs in the stillness of the early morning, I meet you with a smile and warm embrace while I immediately start praying that today, we wouldn’t have tears and perhaps, I can feel better about releasing your still tiny, fragile self to a less than perfect world. Two months later, I’m still waiting for that day when tears fail to escape and when my heart finds peace and ease of sending you off.

This process hasn’t been easy but I bear solace knowing that my parenting, just like this world is imperfect. I have said the wrong things, done the wrong things, broken promises and given you time-outs. But, throughout this journey we have shared so far, I have learnt much, i have tried harder to improve my own shortcomings, I have said sorry, I have laughed and cried with you and in the end, its culminated into this beautiful thing we still long to share. Just like my own imperfections as your mother have brought forward something of beauty and adoration; so too, will school. It is bound to be frustrating and sad and lonely and there will be days when you simply do not want to be there, but my boy, I pray that it will also be rewarding. I  pray that it will be a place of increased growth and positivity and I hope you’ll make new friends, make the right choices, learn new things, spread your wings, be adventurous and be true to what makes you uniquely you. I hope you never lose your sense of curiosity and your wide eyed wonder and I pray that the harshness of this world doesn’t tarnish your gentle demeanor and compassionate spirit.

You crowd my thoughts all day long; I wonder what you’re doing, if those morning tears have dried and on those really hard days when I have to literally peel you away from me, I count down the minutes until we re-unite. This transition is hard on me too but If I can tell you one thing, it is this: irregardless of the fact that daddy and I leave you every morning, God willing, we will always return and please know, that in this imperfect world- you, my child have been one of our more perfect blessings.

xo,
mama